When I was a kid, I used to keep a diary. All the rules I wanted to break and all the wacky shenanigans I needed for success. But, I always, always got caught. Everywhere I'd go she'd turn up, Mommy Not-so Dearest. Hmpf. How did she know? My diary. Turns out, I was writing about the future in the past tense. Hashtag primary problems.