I'm sensing a personal life here. Stop it, immediately. I need your giant head in the game.

I am not going to set up a payment plan with a blackmailer!

Marc, do you think I haven't tried? I've already prostrated myself before the mummified remains of Claire Meade and begged for my job back. She said 'no.' At least I think she said 'no.' She opened her mouth, and a cloud of dust came out.

Now, I know that over the years, the press has had a lot of fun at my expense. You've called me the 'meaner Hitler.' You've said that I'm completely bald and my wigs were made from orphan hair. You've had me sleeping with everyone from Madonna to JFK - only one of which is true.

For God's sake, Nico, lower your voice! Angela Lansbury lives next door, and she'd love to rat me out to the co-op board.

Don't be sorry. Being sorry takes time. Just spit it out.

Marc, scheming is a lonely business.

Marc, this trip is a total disaster. Connor checked out this morning. And I suspect he was tipped off by our bargain bounty hunter. We need a new bounty hunter. Next time I prefer one in brown.

Can you believe there's traffic in Bermuda? Luckily, I've chased felons here before, so I know all the short cuts.

I'm sorry. All those facelifts must have affected your speech. What do you say?

Wake up and smell the aromatherapy, Betty! Being an assistant is boot camp. Being an editor is war. You have your allies, you have your enemies. Oftentimes, you can't tell which is which.

Oh, and malaria—really?! Like I would ever put disease-ridden poor people in the pages of this magazine.

Ugly Betty Quotes

Daniel, I need Marc and you're just going to have to deal with it.


I smell a burrito

Wilhelmina [holding up Betty's earring]