Jackie: We’re all looking for the same thing. Somebody who doesn’t play games. Somebody who’s emotionally available and most especially, somebody who doesn’t wear a wedding ring.
Dan: I don’t know if I can do that.
Jackie: Dan, taking off the ring, it’s not going to erase all the wonderful memories that you had with Roseanne. Your age and drinking history is going to do that.


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Episode:
The Conners Season 2 Episode 18: "Pilot Lights & Sister Fights"
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The Conners
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The Conners Season 2 Episode 18 Quotes

Waitress: Maybe you should call your wife so she can pick you up.
Dan: I’m just staying at the hotel next door and my wife’s dead.
Waitress: You didn’t kill her, did you?
Dan: No.
Waitress: I’m sorry. We’re right off the expressway, we’ve got to ask.

This is why we’re not getting pregnant, because your sperm is too stupid to find my egg.

Darlene