Peter: I'm home!
Lois: Peter?!
Chris: Dad!
Meg: Daddy!
Stewie: What's your name? Is it Alan?


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Characters:
Peter Griffin, Lois Griffin, Meg Griffin, Chris Griffin, Stewie Griffin
Episode:
Family Guy Season 4 Episode 12: "Perfect Castaway"
Show:
Family Guy
Related Quotes:
Peter Griffin Quotes, Lois Griffin Quotes, Meg Griffin Quotes, Chris Griffin Quotes, Stewie Griffin Quotes, Family Guy Season 4 Episode 12 Quotes, Family Guy Quotes
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Family Guy Season 4 Episode 12 Quotes

Peter: Oh guys, I don't know what I'm gonna do. Lois is the only woman for me.
Joe: Well it sounds like you've gotta find a way to win her back.
Quagmire: Yeah, like, like we could get her drunk and take turns having sex with her.
Peter: How would that help me?
Quagmire: Oh, help you? Oh oh, yeah yeah, then no... no then, then that wouldn't help you.

Peter: Hey, hey I got an idea. Let's play "I Never." You got to drink if you did the thing the person says they never did.
Cleveland: Oh I got one. I never slept with a woman with the lights on [Quagmire, Peter and Joe drink]
Joe: I'll go next. Uh, I never had sex with Cleveland's wife [Quagmire and Cleveland drink to this]
Peter: Alright let's see. Uh, I never did a chick in a Logan Airport bathroom [Quagmire drinks... cuts to a bunch of empty beers] God! Let's see, what else is there? Um, I never gave a reach-around to a spider monkey while reciting the Pledge of Allegiance.
Quagmire: Oh god! [drinks]
Joe: I uh, I never picked up an illegal alien from Home Depot to take home and choke me while I touch myself.
Quagmire: Oh come on! [drinks
Peter: Uh, I never did the same thing, but with someone from Jo-Ann Fabrics.
Quagmire: Oh god! This is ridiculous! [drinks and passes out]