The CW Quotes
Cheryl: What about you and Archie canoodling?
Betty: That was just pretend.
Cheryl: I don’t know, cousin, that looked pretty real to me.
Betty: Well, yeah, that was the point.
Cheryl: Right. All I’m saying is your secret is safe with me.
Betty: The sequence holds true for every ghostwriter who proceeded them. It’s actually incredibly simple.
Jughead: Which brings us to a couple of months ago when I was awarded the contract. Why? To put a target on my back. Probably because I was already circling the truth, so he gave you guys a new challenge: to commit the perfect murder against me and be awarded the contract.
Betty: So, the million-dollar question is, “Who was going to kill Jughead and how?”
Mr. DuPont: Well, Mr. Jones…
Jughead: Shut up!
[The room silences]
Jughead: Mr. DuPont, as they say in Lord of the Flies, “I have the conch.”
Jughead: What, did you miss me?
Bret: You’ve got to be kidding me?!
Mr. DuPont: Mr. Jones, we all thought you were…
Jughead: That I was dead?! Yeah, for a minute there I thought I was too.
Jughead: Hey, what’s that often-used Mark Twain quote? “Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.”
Joan: What is happening right now?
Betty: It is called getting your comeuppance, Joan.
Gravedigger: I can’t believe you got up! But you can’t do it, can you? You can’t kill for blood, right?
Black Lightning: You and I are blood.
Gravedigger: That’s funny.
Agent Odell: [Sighs.]
Khalil: Now, you didn’t really think I would let you get away after making me kill my mom, did you?
[Agent Odell utters trigger phrase]
Khalil: That shutdown only works for Painkiller. I’m Khalil.
Khalil: We haven’t officially met.
Anissa: Look, so what’s your assessment?
Lynn: She’s in a coma. I’m sorry, Hunny, but you know how this goes. It could be 10 minutes or it could be 10 years. And there’s no data on how the shapeshifting might affect it.
Anissa: Come on, come on, come on! There’s gotta be something you can do?
Lynn: She needs to be someplace where she can have constant care. And we can pray.
Major Grey: Mr. Gambi, we know you’re in here. We know you have the briefcase.
Gambi: I can’t help but you have your most trusted commandos with you.
Major Grey: Showing off that you’re in our personnel files, tailor? Brag much!
Gambi: Thank you for bringing me the last ASA agents who know the Pierce family secrets.
Major Grey: You’re welcome! They all know you very well. You’re not getting out of here.
Gambi: I’ve seen worse.
[Gambi unleashes bullets from a machine gun]
Donna: You must really miss your brother? When was the last time you saw him? He isn’t really dead, is he?!
[Betty comes rushing over]
Betty: Donna, are you serious?! This is Jughead’s little sister and you’re accosting her!
Donna: Oh, come on, Betty. You and I both know this is all an act.
Betty: B****, I’m done with you. Let’s go.
Veronica: Well, well, well! If it isn’t the girl who cried, “Papi.”
Hermosa: I did a little digging like you asked me to.
Hermosa: You are lucky I am such a good P.I. because you’ll never believe what I found out.
Donna: In case you’ve forgotten, I’m the brains of this operation. We still have a job to finish and a meddlesome girlfriend to pin this on.
Donna: And if you ever undermine me again, you will go the way of Jonathan, may he rest in peace. And that’s a fact.
Alice: Though, I understand you made quite the public spectacle over the Archie and Betty romance?
Veronica: Hmmm, I think you mean I gave an amazing performance?
Alice: But weren’t you afraid that something might actually spark between them?
Veronica: I trust Archie, and I trust Betty. To be honest, the thought never crossed my mind.