Ladies, you’re wasting your time. He can’t speak and he doesn’t like girls. He’s a vegetable and a fruit.

Lester

• Permalink: Ladies, you’re wasting your time. He can’t speak and he doesn’t like girls. He’s a vegetable...
• Added: April 21, 2014

Max is right. There are two things in life you cannot lose, a rent-controlled apartment and bladder control.

Earl

• Permalink: Max is right. There are two things in life you cannot lose, a rent-controlled apartment and...
• Added: April 21, 2014

As soon as they find out this Lester Donovan is no longer living there, the rent will get higher than Justin Bieber on a plane with his dad.

Max

• Permalink: As soon as they find out this Lester Donovan is no longer living there, the rent will get...
• Added: April 21, 2014

Max: I love our toilet lawn.
Caroline: It’s gross.

• Permalink: It’s gross.
• Added: April 21, 2014

Everybody, please! Han clearly just injured his vagina.

Max

• Permalink: Everybody, please! Han clearly just injured his vagina.
• Added: April 21, 2014

Well, my high was catching a glimpse of a customer’s lacy g-string and my low was seeing his junk.

Oleg

• Permalink: Well, my high was catching a glimpse of a customer’s lacy g-string and my low was seeing his...
• Added: April 21, 2014

My high was finding a barrette in the bathroom and my low was imagining my life without it.

Caroline

• Permalink: My high was finding a barrette in the bathroom and my low was imagining my life without it.
• Added: April 21, 2014