Accidentally on Purpose Season 1 Episode 8: "The Third Man" Quotes
My love life is more depressing than a war-torn Soviet state.
Billie
Brian: [Pam] didn't want to have kids. Which is what I love about you. Because if things work out between us, it's like an instant family. I'm an automatic dad.
Billie: Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Tha-- that's very sweet. But my situation is a little more complicated than that. I mean, there's Zack.
Brian: Oh, so you're keeping Zack?
Pam: He used to call me his muse. Didn't ya?
Brian: Well, I called you a lot of things. Muse was one of them.
Zack: Look, I know it doesn't look like it, but I'm doing all this because I care about you.
Billie: I know you do, but there has to be a universe where I get to be happy too. Please be happy with me.
(to Zack) Oh, man! You were right about that guy. He's trying to steal your baby. Like a reverse stork.
Davis
Billie: What are you doing?
Zack: I'm looking out for you.
Billie: Well, stop it. I have been dating since... oh my God! Since you were in kindergarten.
(to Zack) When I saw that guy kissing your pregnant lady, I got this really sick feeling in my stomach. Kinda like the time I saw my mom skinny-dipping with my Uncle Bob.
Davis
