What's Holt's expression right now? Would you describe it as 'proud daddy?'

Jake

Are they totally shocked? Is Kelly like 'what just happened?'

Jake

Jake: C.J. will just tell everyone the truth.
Keith: No he won't, I bought him off.

Jake: You said you were kidnapped for real.
C.J.: Well, I don't want people to think I was fake-kidnapped.

We make a scary hostage video where it looks like we're going to kill C.J.

Boyle

I'm sorry Madeline for everything. Especially for pushing you into Michelle Obama from behind and then running away.

Holt

Now I know why you refer to this as a suicide squad Peralta. Because I already want to kill myself.

Holt

Holt: Should we throw him a parade?
Jake: Yeah! Maybe!

One-two-two! One-two-two! I sound like a damn choo-choo train!

Terry

Case goes to the Spice Boys.

Holt

I took that thing weeks ago, and I passed! I'm already a lieutenant!

Terry

To Terry Jeffords, the ultimate human/genius.

Holt

Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quotes

Jake: So talk to me Goose, how are we lookin'?
Gina: Sexy, but not like we're trying to, but like, sure we're trying, but it's almost effortless?

Holt: I know you'd all rather be at home binge-watching media content...
Jake: Ohhh! I just started the second season of "Media Content". No spoilers.