Chicken soup has sustained my people for centuries.

Cooper

Drugs are bad. They make my tongue feel like cheese.

Cooper

And you wanna add a fifth child so we can field our own volleyball team?

Charlotte

Do you know how many times I've peed since we've been here? Five. Five times. God, I'd sell my soul for a good 'ol UTI I could bitch slap into submission with some simple antibiotics.

Charlotte

It's not fun, it's disgusting. I'm having a litter like some kind of animal. These bloodsucking ticks growing inside of me are taking over my body so I'm just a host now. That's only the beginning. These are the salad days until I start waddling around with a veritable wide-load sign across my gut which by the way is going to be crisscrossed with so many stretch marks that look like the top of the map of Yellowstone. Miracle pregnancy, my ass... my big fat ever-expanding ass.

Charlotte

If you want to keep those hands, keep them off my uterus.

Charlotte

I stayed sober this year for 365 days, and that is no small miracle. And I can't take credit for it. These steps, these rooms, you people, you carried me through.

Amelia

My swimmers beat the big bad, IUD. Seriously, I'm like Michael Phelps.

Cooper

Addison: He is Zeus. He's Thor. He's Beckham.
Violet: You're mixing up your mythologies and soccer players.
Addison: He's flypaper and women are the flies.

I could tap-dance for you. Say the words. I will slap two tacks on the bottom of these shoes right now.

Addison

I'm all in and I'm fighting for you.

Sam

Mason's changed me. Henry's changed you. We're softer.

Charlotte

Private Practice Quotes

I think I can see your arteries closing up from here.

Jake

"Never talk about your penis when you hug another man."

JACKSON

Private Practice Music

  Song Artist
Song Lost The Mary Onettes
Down In The Valley The Broken West iTunes
Song Message From Yuz The Switches