Seriously who needs to see all that blood? Unless it's Game of Thrones, I'm not interested.


The problem isn't that I threw away my red band, Dash. The problem is that I put it on in the first place.


Hunter: Have you ever heard of a guy named David Rosen?
Kara: I'm from Beverly Hills, I know like seven David Rosens.

Hunter: I told you to stay.
Kara: Yeah, I'm not a Golden Retriever.

I'm sorry if there's even a chance he's taking his clothes off, I have to be there.


Maybe they came to burn their bras in honor of nurse Jackson.


Sorry, I'm just not good at taking sides, especially since one of the sides has George Clooney hair and could be the father of my future child.


Brittany, in the three days since Jackson's been gone I've worked four doubles which I didn't even know was mathematically possible. I've been thrown up on eleven times, shaved a screaming child whose medication was making him grow body hair, and now I'm compulsively eating deep fried beef just to stay awake.


You used to be straight Mom. I'd say you've changed a lot.


Well if that's true then you need to focus less on who you like and more on liking yourself.


Amazing what parasites and a lack of a good sun screen can do.

Dr. Erin Grace

Just to be clear, I choose you.


Red Band Society Quotes

The barista was one of those home-schooled types. I wasn't sure he could spell scary without an e but he managed.

Nurse Jackson

Everyone has two stories. The one they want you to know and the one they don't.