Scrubs Season 3 Episode 3: "My White Whale" Quotes
Sean: Hey J.D., I was thinking we'd start out with me watching how you interact with your interns and then your brain's gonna tell you to be a little self-conscience but you just need to ignore the voice in your head.
J.D.'s Narration: Kick him in the crotch and run.
J.D.: I'll try Sean.
J.D.: Okay, that's it. I-I-I'm sorry, Sean, I'm a doctor, okay? I-I'm teaching humans, not dolphins, okay? So it isn't really helpful for me to know what works on fish.
Sean: They're mammals, actually.
J.D.: Oh, well, Sean! Unfortunately for me, my interns aren't mammals!
Sean: J.D., they are.
J.D.: The girl one just called you "Dr. Jerk"!
Turk: No sweat. You should hear what they call Dr. Mickhead.
J.D.: ...What?
Turk: These right here, you see these names? They are called patients. This one needs brain work, this one needs a heart...
J.D.: This one needs courage.
Turk: Helping or hurting J.D., helping or hurting?!
Elliot: What are you doing?
Bruce: It's just a nervous habit. It helps me concentrate.
Elliot: Yeah, well, you know what helps me concentrate?
Bruce: Me not doing that?
Elliot: No, bunnies.
J.D.: S-sh-I don't care, Sean! Come on, Turk!
Turk: Hey. I just wanted you to know I don't have a problem with you, I just can't resist a good storm-off.
Sean: Oh, who can?
Dr. Cox: You have kids?
Dr. Norris: One. She hates dolls.
Dr. Cox: Boy, that's a bummer.
Dr. Norris: Tell me about it.
Bruce performs a beatboxing routine
Elliot: Oh, my God, Bruce! That was amazing! Where did you learn how to do that?
Bruce: In temple.
J.D.: Look, Brian, if you're having that much trouble with your case report, I'd be glad to take a look at it for you, pal.
Brian: Cool. Try to have it back by 5.
J.D.: O...kay. I have a lot of things to do...but...
J.D.: S-sh-I don't care, Sean!
J.D.: Come on, Turk!
Turk: Hey. I just wanted you to know I don't have a problem with you, I just can't resist a good storm-off.
Sean: Oh, who can?
Dr. Kelso: Fantastic, sport. But that's the brachial artery and it's not how we draw blood. Now, if we need to inject him with heroin, you'll be the first one I call.
Elliot: Dr. Kelso...
Dr. Kelso: What is it, Dr. Reid? Do you have something to say?
Elliot: ...No.
Dr. Kelso: You know, son, you remind me of her so much, you're just a break-down in the supply closet away from being the same person!
Dr. Kelso: That's horrible work. Horrible!
Elliot: Dr. Kelso, I do have something to say.
He gives her a blank look.
Elliot: Remember earlier, you asked me if I had something to say?
Dr. Kelso: No!
Elliot: Well, you did.
