I'm qualified for this job because I have 17 years of experience, and I know everything there is to know about our customers. But, if all you're looking for is somebody with a spicy last name, then I suggest you keep looking.

Amy

Jonah: You got the job?
Amy: I got the job.

Dina: She's gonna kill it out in California. I mean, professionally. She's gonna take a major hit in the hotness rankings.
Jonah: So, you're okay with Amy leaving?
Dina: Me? Oh, no. I hate it. I'm gonna go home and stress eat an entire jar of olives. But, this is pretty huge for her.
Jonah: Yeah. Yeah, it is. Yeah. It's good that you're being so supportive. I went a different direction with it.

Amy: So, you don't think I'm selling out?
Jonah: I think you're right. You gotta do this.
Amy: Well, I appreciate that. But there's so much to think about. I mean, there's the kids, and what am I going to do about Emma's school? Then there's this guy that I'm seeing in St. Louis...
Jonah: Well, maybe that guy you're seeing should just go with you.
Amy: Oh. Wow. You mean he would just move to California? For me?
Jonah: Yeah. I mean, why should you be the only one gets a taste of that sweet public transpo?
Amy: Yeah, but their water resource management is...
Jonah: I can overlook it.
Amy: Okay. Yeah. Let's move to California together.

Come on, this is Amy we're talking about. "Filled up on bread" is gonna go on her gravestone.

Dina

Brian: Oh, wow. You're not just the assistant manager, you're like a detective. That is cool. Do you ever need any backup?
Dina: No. No. Never work with a partner. They're either dead weight or they turn on you. Oh, wait! You meant you.
Brian: If that's okay...
Dina: Oh, yeah!
Brian: Yeah?
Dina: This is great.

Jonah: It's just lunch! You're great at lunch! You do it every day.
Amy: Yeah, but your family's gonna be there. And you know my eating style isn't for everyone.

Amy and I just had a lovely talk in the bathroom. You know, what she and Jonah have is something really very special. I deserve someone who loves me like that. We'll talk later. Just letting you know, I want a divorce.

Marilyn

Amy: It's just that Josh is really hard on Jonah and I was just getting a little protective. And I get it. That the med school lie was nuts, but you know, it was one lie. And it didn't hurt anybody, because Jonah doesn't hurt people. He's...he's good.
Marilyn: You really care for him.

Amy: This isn't a joke. She finished her therapy and she's been cleared to come back to work.
Dina: So, after everything she's done she can just waltz back in here and wear the blue vest. The only vest she should be wearing is one with black and white stripes.
Amy: Like a referee?
Dina: No, like a jail vest. Like, a vest you wear in jail.

Justine: You're buying Carol lunch? So, she gets rewarded for traumatizing Sandra.
Sayid: So, that's how it works? Hey, Sandra. I'm going to slice you open while you sleep. I'll take a smoothie, please.

Amy: Look, we don't need an HR rep hanging around here auditing us, writing everyone up for all the little things I let slide. Like, visible tattoos, and the pictures you put in your lockers, and unbuttoning your pants at lunch.
Marcus: To let air in so the mold doesn't come back. It's called hygiene!

Superstore Quotes

It was nice of corporate to wait an entire week before they reminded us we're just as replaceable as Mateo.

Jonah

Jonah: I think he likes Taylor Swift.
Cheyenne: No, he's back to hating her again.