I apologize if I haven't been the friend you deserve. But I want you to know, in my way, I love you all.

Sheldon

I was under a misapprehension that my accomplishments were mine alone. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have been encouraged, sustained, inspired, and tolerated. Not only by my wife, but by the greatest group of friends anyone ever had.

Sheldon

Penny: It's so strange. No matter how thoughtless and selfish he is, I still love him.
Leonard: If you think about it, he has kind of been our practice kid.
Penny: Like, when you make pancakes and the first one comes out a little wonky?

Sheldon: I hate to say it but I think everyone is being incredibly selfish.
Amy: Well, you would be the authority on the subject.

Sheldon: UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!
Penny: What?
Leonard: He thinks you're sick.
Penny: Oh. Should we tell him?
Leonard: If we don't, he might try to jump out of the plane.
Penny: Doesn't answer my question.

Amy: She's probably just air-sick.
Sheldon: But what if she's not. What if we get what she has? What if we infect the King of Sweden? That's how wars start.

Penny: I don't like to drink when I fly.
Bernadette: Please, I've seen you drink in the shower.
Howard: You guys have showered together?

Amy: This is about humbly accepting a great honor.
Sheldon: Amy, we won the Nobel Prize in Physics. Humility is for people who win the goofy Nobels like Literature, Economics, and Peace.
Amy: Please tell me that's not in your speech.
Sheldon: I can cut it but it's the only joke I have.

Amy: Sheldon, why are you talking so fast?
Sheldon: I'm trying to get my speech down to ninety minutes.
Amy: Nobody's going to be able to understand a word you're saying.
Sheldon: Welcome to my life.

Raj: Please if you have any problems, any questions, call me immediately, okay? She's my baby.
Bert: It shouldn't come up but just in case... Where could I buy a dog that looks exactly like her? Kidding. If she dies, I'll just tell you.

Bernadette: You realize it's been years since we've gone away, just the two of us?
Howard: I know. I can't wait. Fancy hotel room. The big bed.
Bernadette: Yeah, we're going to sleep our asses off.

Amy: Do you want to go back to the apartment and see me try on my dress?
Sheldon: Shouldn't I see it for the first time at the Nobel ceremony?
Amy: It's not a wedding.
Sheldon: Okay. Well, give me a minute to think of another reason I don't want to see it.

The Big Bang Theory Season 12 Episode 23 Quotes

Leonard: I'm done enabling him. Like, this is HIS spot. And the thermostat has to be set to his comfort level even though he doesn't even live here anymore and I'm always chilly.
Raj: Is that why you wear a hoodie all the time?
Leonard: YES.

Sheldon: The only drug I need is the endorphins pumping through my brain in anticipation of our victory.
Amy: Well, technically, anticipation wouldn't be mediated by endorphins as much as dopamine but, y'know, you've been up all night so I'll give you that one.