Nedley: Gezz! Look, former invisible monster teen. Wear a bell, will you?
Billy: Um, so.
Rachel: Maybe.
Nedley: Wow. You two work out this whole presentation ahead of time?
Rachel: Please Randy.
Nedley: Okay. He can come. But, there's only going to be one kind of tent we're pitching on this trip.

Waverly: First wedding massacre, in 1922. Ah! A Ms. H, left at the altar, killed her guests
Nicole: Well that is a terrible way to be dumped on.
Waverly: Awful enough to want to destroy every future wedding in town?
Nicole: Baby, if you left me at the alter, I would fuck shit up. I might kill Nedly!
Waverly: Nicole!
Nicole: I'm kidding! I think.

Doc: Where did you buy your wedding gown? Jeremy and I are looking to procure matching cummerbunds.
Waverly: Aw! I got it at this adorably quaint little boutique down on Hogback Road.
Wynonna: Did she say quaint or taint?

Wynonna: The bride-to-be is vegan.
Nicole: Yes.
Wynonna: Buttercream is not vegan.
Nicole: Nope.
Wynonna: Ergo, Waverly can't eat her own wedding cake!
Nicole: Meh. What if we just didn't tell her?
Wynonna: This isn't a secret wife, Nicole. This is the matrimonial icing!

Wynonna: Cleo, call them off. Call it all off. You can just leave.
Cleo: You know better than anyone you can never just leave the Ghost River Triangle, and for me, those things, always linked to my soul but not for long ‘cause I’m about to pass the torch off to our family’s greatest enemy.
Wynonna: No, don’t do this.
Cleo: And once you become heir, you will kill everyone who means anything to you, and the worst part, you’ll still be in there, watching yourself do it. Gonna like my poor brothers.
Wynonna: I don’t want to do this again, but I will shoot another human.

Dark Angel Waverly: You’ve seen what’s coming. You know what awaits you next.
Doc: I also know that Wynonna taught us there is always another way.

Clanton Heir Doc: I do not need a prison to best you, but your fear gets them excited.
Wynonna: I can get you excited if you let me take you home.
Clanton Heir Doc: The next time I step on Earp whore land, it will be to coat it in the blood of your kin.
Wynonna: Leave my friends out of this.
Clanton Heir Doc: You never did.
Wynonna: They wanted to help.
Clanton Heir Doc: Now they’ll die.
Wynonna: I know you’re in there. Fight, for god sake, Doc, fight.

Mercedes: Guys, I am literally dying, and we all know I was born to be a vampire.
Jeremy: That is actually a good idea.
Doc: Are you sure?
Jeremy: If you don’t, she’s a goner.
Doc: I’ve never sired anyone before. I will need your express consent.
Jeremy: Consent is so important.
Mercedes: Vamp permission granted. Now get over here and suck me off already.

Wynonna: I’m going to find Waverly.
Billy: That’s Rachel’s blood.
Wynonna: We don’t know that.
Billy: Yes, I do. A Clanton can’t unreap another Clanton. Wynonna, she’s in danger.
Wynonna: I’m not going back to your ranch. The last time I was there… it’s a trap, kid.
Billy: Who cares? You have a magic gun, and Rachel needs you to save her. I severed the root. I got tortured by my own mom to save you.
Wynonna: You were trying to save Rachel.
Billy: So you owe me one, and you owe her a few.
Wynonna: There’s only one of me, man.
Billy: You’re Wynonna Earp. Rachel used to go on about you guys, how it was after you came back.
Wynonna: Yeah, I’m an asshole. I’m a mess.
Billy: She said it got better. You were awesome, and she’s not some powerful angel. She’s on her own. Waverly would want you.
Wynonna: Low blow, asshole junior. Let’s go.

Mercedes: My dental surgeon is going to kill me. Those veneers were fresh. Guess I could just drain him.
Jeremy: We really need to work on appetite suppression.
Mercedes: What are you, a 90s modeling agency? I will eat who I want. No more diets.

Dark Angel Waverly: Give it to me, and I shall return home.
Doc: You are home.
Dark Angel Waverly: So be it. I shall take it from you.
Doc: No.
Dark Angel Waverly: You dare to defy me?
Doc: I am doing this for my friend Waverly Earp. Now you get out of her.
Dark Angel Waverly: I am her.
Doc: No, you sure as shit ain’t.

Rachel: Whatever choices Wynonna’s made, she has a plan, and I trust her.
Cleo: Oh, the only thing you should trust is that sick little feeling in your gut because that reaper in the fog with Wynonna, it is Billy.
Rachel: No, Wynonna wouldn’t do that to me.
Cleo: Billy may have pulled out his own tooth to save you, but Wynonna, she’s leading him to his death. I am not your enemy, Rachel, really. I just want to get the hell out of this place for good. And Wynonna, she is a shit just like every Earp before her.
Rachel: She’s good people, and she’s my family.
Cleo: OK, sweetie. But are you hers?

Wynonna Earp Season 4 Quotes

Nedley: You want to get a little more specific on our plan here, Warrior Princess?
Wynonna: Yeah, sure. Find and climb invisible stairs, yeat Waverly and Doc out of supernatural garden, uh, locate the rest of our squad, mosey on home, enjoy a curse-free life. And I’m going to look good doing it.
Nedley: You and me both.

You almost done? I feel like I’ve been standing here for two years.

Nedley