J.D.: So, what was up with Mr. Simms back there?
Turk: Ahhh, during his open-lung biopsy, I accidentally nicked his intercostal artery, and now he's got a hematoma.
J.D.: Are you gonna tell him?
Turk: What, and risk a lawsuit? Are you crazy?

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J.D., Turk
Scrubs Season 2 Episode 16: "My Karma"
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Scrubs Season 2 Episode 16 Quotes

Jordan: I was going to tell him the truth eventually, I just wanted to see if he was going to be with me because he wanted to, not because he had to. Do you know what I mean?
J.D.: What are you talking about?
Jordan: It's his baby, stupid! Don't tell anyone

Ted: I honestly don't know what put the idea of golfing on the roof in my head!
Todd: Dude! It is so nice out here! You mind if I take it down to the banana hammock?