Leslie: Let me just clear up some things. I am Dr. Leslie Berkowitz. Penelope's boss, and also I'm Lydia's exclusive, non-sexual, platonic companion.
Brian: What does that mean?
Leslie: I don't know.

Elena: How do you do it?
Penelope: Do what, honey?
Elena: Be alone, go through life without a partner who cares about you.
Penelope: Okay, well that's one way of putting it. Actually, I've been talking about this in therapy, and I love being alone, it's the best. And we're strong women who don't need a partner to define us.

Syd: But no high school couples make it through college. Are we just fooling ourselves? We don't wanna be those people.
Elena: You know what? Screw it. Let's be those people.

Alex: Why don't you do a trial run? Like, you go to the bathroom, and Syd, you try not to file a missing persons' report.
Elena: Haha. We can be apart, Alex.
Syd: And they make you wait twenty-four hours.

Alex: Listen, Mom, you're a strong independent woman who doesn't need a man.
Penelope: Yup, got it, I agree. But it's okay for me to admit that I can still be a feminist badass and want a boyfriend.

Leslie Jones: Girl, you better work!
RuPaul: Leslie, are you recording this?
Leslie Jones: Yeah, girl! This is how I do it at home. I live-tweet live!
[They all laugh]
Leslie Jones: And you is bomb! You look like a banana birthday cake! [RuPaul giggling]
RuPaul: And you look amazing!
Leslie Jones: Thank you! I am channeling Diana Ross tonight.
RuPaul: Call her “Ms. Jones.”
[Leslie bursts out laughing]

[Sigh] I am a little nervous. This is the first design challenge that we’ve had, and I’ve only sewn one garment before this. So, pray for me.

Heidi N Closet

RuPaul: [About Jaida] Oooh, she is giving me Bee-yonce.
[Scene switches to Aidan Zhane dancing]
RuPaul: And she is giving me Bea Arthur!

Brita: I had an amazing dream last night.
Heidi N Closet: What was it?
Brita: I won RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 12.
Aiden Zhane: And then you woke up.
[All the girls laughing, Brita shocked]

Olivia Munn: Until one day I realized, “What is the one thing I have that no one else has? And that’s me.” And you really have such a fun energy that no one else has. That will make the difference for you, not the amount of makeup you put on.
RuPaul: Amen!
Crystal Methyd: Thank you.

RuPaul: Have any of you done improv before?
Heidi N Closer: [Speaking of herself] She has done improv in the bedroom.
RuPaul: Oh my god, you are a character. You are a char-ac-ter!
[They all laugh]

RuPaul: Now ladies, for today’s Mini Challenge, it’s time for a queer peer assessment. Widow Von’Du and Jaida Essence Hall, please step forward. You each won your premiere episodes; now based on your first impressions, I want you to line up the queens you just met from top to bottom. From who you think is your strongest competitor to who you think is your weakest competitor.
Jaida Essence Hall: [Confessional] Shaaaddy boots. Shady boots!
RuPaul: Ladies, it’s not personal. It’s just drag.

TV Quotes Quotes

Amanda: You don't know how you made it to the surface?
Nolan: No, but the purple skins do.
Amanda: Purple skins?
Nolan: I'll tell you on the way

Conquer! Kill! Devour! Put it on a T-shirt so you don't forget.

Doc Yewll