Max: Yes, I'm her registered emotional companion.
Leo: Well, this is a legal proceeding and that's a highly unusual request.
Caroline: But not improbable. We googled it.
Max: Yeah, she's allowed to have an emotional companion as long as both attorneys agree.
Leo: Well, I graduated top of my class at Harvard. But, since you googled it, I'll try to make that happen.

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2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 20: "And the Drug Money"
2 Broke Girls
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2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 20 Quotes, 2 Broke Girls Quotes
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2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 20 Quotes

Max: Are you sure you didn't represent the woman who ate her child?
Leo: I've never represented anyone who ate their child ... on 'Law & Order.'

I was not talking hot. I was apologizing. She's still angry I left home. She thinks I'm freewheeling American who takes drugs and has intercourse with dirty Kardashians.