Puck: Merry Hanukkah, dude.
Jake: Right back at you, bro.

Hey! One Puckerman just ate your lunch! What do you think's gonna happen when we unload two barrels of Puckshot into your ugly mugs?

Quinn: Home for the holidays, just like we promised.
Finn: Guys, I...
Puck: Dude, if you start crying, I'm gonna kick your ass. Group hug!

[to Jake] I know what it feels like to be scared that you're not important, or smart, or worth anything. We had the same dad, bro.

[to Jake] You think you're a badass? Nailing a bunch of chicks and beating up some punks in the cafeteria? I'm the original badass. I had my first threesome at seven, and once, I beat up a police horse.

C-! That's a Puckerman A+! I'm graduating!

Puck: Funny thing about a kiss. If it comes at the right time from the right girl, it can be like magic. It can bring you back to life, like CPR with tongues. It can change you, even if it's just back into what you always were: An all-original, Grade A bad ass.

If you ever need me, you know where to find me...right here in Lima...repeating my senior year forever.

It's no use. My brain is like a Roach Motel. When the info checks in it never checks out.

Keep rocking that mullet Ricky. Maybe in 10 years it'll come back in style.

Puck: You know it's hard growing up without a dad because you don't have any dude role models, except NFL players and video game characters. But I lucked out because instead of one dad, I got a whole gang of them. You guys showed me what it means to be a man, not just last night but for four years. Even you, Blaine.
Blaine: Thanks?

I may not be too good at world geography but I'm real good at female geography.

Glee Quotes

We're a family and you're always welcome here, even if you just need to take a break and think things through.

Will

I would totally put that suit on... eBay.

Puck