Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCAgents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Season 5 Episode 1: "Orientation (Part One)" Quotes
No reason to send a message back to Earth… we’re already here....
Simmons
Simmons: Magic is just science we don’t understand yet!
Mack: Oh, please! We just got zapped through space by Stonehenge, and we’re trying to rule out the involvement of a flame-headed demon from East LA! Science, my ass!
Virgil: Don’t be crazy, you’re not here to save *me*!
Coulson: Who, then?
Virgil: Humanity!
So SHIELD doesn’t have a space division called SPEAR or something? Really? I always thought you guys had people hiding on the moon!
Yo-Yo
Mack [to Coulson]: Look, I’m just saying, what good is it having a state-of-the-art robotic hand if you don’t have it on you when you’re kidnapped by Martians?!
Yo-Yo: Looks like he’s got both hands to me.
Mack: It’s just a prosthetic without all the cool doodads. I mean, it should’ve been a hook! At least you can stab things with a hook!
Coulson: I thought I was gonna be arrested!
Yo-Yo: So, wait. That one doesn’t have the blowtorch or the laser gun or anything?
Coulson: First of all, I’m not Inspector Gadget! And second of all, the authorities would’ve confiscated it! Prison’s bad enough without being down an appendage!
Mack: First rule of Boy Scouts is “Always come prepared!”
Simmons: Okay. Alright. Any idea which *part* of space we’re in?
Coulson: Uh… outer?
Mack: What’s going on?!
Coulson [gestures at an unconscious Virgil]: I was about to find out!
Mack: Oh, my bad! I see a dirty-looking dude hovering over you with a crazy-looking gun, I acted on impulse!
Virgil: You’re here. Agent Coulson of SHIELD. You’ve come to save us!
Coulson: Just to clarify, where is “here,” who is “us,” and from what?!
